STEP INTO MY WORLD

just a thought...

2005-11-24T17:12:00.000-08:00

It's not always about the sex, it's about the mind as well...:)

My own tidbits...Last thoughts

2005-11-14T17:43:00.000-08:00

I am a bit of a nerd. I love my glasses as well as my contacts. I'm usually interested in a persons 2nd layer, not their looks. Parents/family are my backbone. All my cars are stick-shift:) I love crappy 80's movies. I believe in meaningful coincidences... I try not to do anything I 'll regret the next day! I can't stand know-it alls! annoying!! I eat out at least 5 times a week, ok maybe 6. I can carry a conversation with a total stranger. I think I am confident, without being arrogant (big difference). I value integrity and authenticity. I still turn heads at almost 38...(how old?) Love jeans/t-shirt as well as dressing up. Not into crude humor at others expense (not cool). I Love to sit through movie credits :) I am more laid-back and just go with the flow. I am usually true to my word, and try not to assume and take things personally. I may 'look' high-maintenence, but I am not. (that's the beauty of it:) Always trying to learn new things. I am confortable with who I am now. I think I am a socially liberated person- hey, live and let live-(whatever floats your boat!) we are works in progress!! Is the glass half empty or half full??? Sometimes I will laugh out loud from something I remembered in the past. I can be happy and nervous and confortable all at the same time. I don't do pantyhose, and sometimes no underwear as well:) I am good after a couple of cocktail...yea, a cheap date!! Loyal and kind, my favorite....

End of the Rainbow...good-bye

2005-11-14T16:19:00.000-08:00

As much as I loved writing, and how much this blog means to me, after much consideration, I have decided to end this. Something I don't want to do, but feel I must do. I started with so much inspiration, motivation and even passion, but it is something that has left me, ( I thought it would always be here) just like a piece of my heart. I knew I was always fragile. Things tugg at my heart so easy. My very own downfall. This blog has become an intergrated part of me. Alot of things on here I never knew existed in me. I know this blog was more of the softer side of me, the real me. but who wants to know about that? I mean who gives a fuck about what I find sexy, what inspires me, or what matters in my head or heart? No one really. I have no one to write for. As long as I know about myself, I guess that's all that matters now. If you want to know something about me, just ask. I know some of you wanted to read about more of the illicit stuff, things that are out of the norm, and with that a new blog is being born. Carmela, my alter ego, my wilder side, my evil twin, who is a part of me as well will take you there. There you will find just 'exactly' what I think, see, feel, and do in this lifestyle (swingers) as well as my own personal thoughts regarding the real world or whatever. NO HOLDS BARR. You wanted it, you got it...

Thank you for reading and for all the great mail, suggestions, and even pics:)

So I say good-bye now with a heavy heart...but who knows if by chance that passion, that missing piece of my heart, happens to find and inspire me again and re-enter my life, so be it...

All my love, Carmela

p.s. I will be putting up my last few post that were in the works.

Broken hearts...

2005-11-11T07:08:00.000-08:00

So many days and nights I spent wondering
was I just chasing a dream?
how can something so beautiful be out of my reach?
I thought perhaps I meant something,
but it is not me your thinking of.
I have just come to realize I was just a stepping stone,
to ease your broken heart.
I've always stayed true to my heart, but I don't think I was a part of yours.
I feel you slipping away
right in front of my very eyes.
If I could just tell you everything,
the way you make me feel,
the way you make my eyes twinkle when I hear your voice
...it is a voice I don't hear often anymore.
I know I have been there for you
someone you can count on
in more ways than one
but perhaps I just was not good enough.
I was just not good enough...
Now at night I lay quietly and feel the tears running down my face
broken heart,
only to have my pillow soaked
thinking of what could've been, why have you gone?

Tending the Garden

2005-11-10T07:33:00.000-08:00

Come into my garden, my dear
and sow the seeds of love.
Whatever your hearts desire
all life from the Lord above.

In my garden you will find
life, truth, happpiness, love...
everything out in the open,
nothing to fear, nothing to hide
everything unturned- rocks, stones
but especially in my garden, you will be home.

My garden needs tending,
it has been waiting for you.
so let us plant the seed
and watch the flower grow,
she flourishes beautifully
because it was planted with nothing but pure love...
so come into my garden, and sow the seeds of love.

Fantasy into Reality

2005-11-08T06:35:00.000-08:00

I knew it was so
I have been searching and searching
for that one elusive male
that would give me added delight
"I will rock your world" you say
let's make fantasy into reality.

I try to live them
to make it happen
right or wrong
with no regrets.
no should've, would've, could've.
many times I thought
"I just dont want anybody,"
"I want someone different, "
someone who is an integrated part of me.
maybe he is fearful
of the other world I can show him
where anything goes
and all insecurities are left at the door.

are you just my fantasy or
am I just your fantasy? NO.
Fantasy into reality.
I will keep searching for
my elusive male
I know I am not an' illusion within the illusion'
I am real,
and wherever you are
I hope you are too...

Joel Osteen

2005-11-07T08:24:00.000-08:00

I was watching his sermon last night. The topic was" Keeping your heart pure." #284
I must say, he is a very well-spoken and inspirational person. God did truly bless him with a fine gift. I love listening to him. His sermons get me through the week. I don't have any of his books like I do Billy Graham's, (another one of my spiritual favorites and a great crusader).
HHmmm... Perhaps I should put it on my Christmas list!

Tylenol p.m. nights

2005-11-05T23:41:00.000-08:00

Well, Halloween came and went. I had a pretty quiet weekend, I just loved passing out the candy to the little children. Sometimes, I wish I were young again...

This week I had been in soo much pain. I had my wisdom teeth removed (what? at this age?) (they have been bothering me for years off and on...)
and I will never go through that shit again. Give me childbirth any day. All that novacaine, tugging, pulling, and drilling. No wonder dentists are the worst feared doctors! I am tired of the soft foods, sore mouth, and swollen face. I don't think my jaws will ever be the same! Tylenol p.m. has become my new best friend!! I barely just discovered the world of sleep aids when my wisdom teeth started bothering me again. I have a high tolerance for pain, so I usually just dealt with the pain without medications. I know my body. So when I do take meds, it works! the dosage calls for 2 tablets at bedtime. I take 1/2 of one pill and I am knocked out!! If I took 2 tablets I would be out for 3 days!!! lol Thanks, tylenol p.m. for getting me to dreamland...

Who has my heart now?

2005-10-31T17:05:00.001-08:00

Who has my heart now?
Where have you gone dear one?
no longer around, just as I imagined,
now being invisible to me.
Am I not what you wanted?
I would gladly give you the world,
take everything, take all of me.
I thought you would always be here
just like you said,
but you are nowhere to be found.

I gave my heart so freely
time and time again
only to be pushed away, who has my heart now?
I am so vulnerable,
I have to tell you so.

I only wanted a simple "hello,"
"how are you today?"
I am "just fine" I would say with a smile.
because I know you were thinking of me,
just like I was thinking of you.
who has my heart now?

I am just too trusting with my heart,
always looking out, always asking,
always caring for you.
I hope I was a part of your life
if even just for a little bit,
but do know, you are a big part of mine.
Do you still want my heart?
because you will always be in mine...

Trick-or-Treat

2005-10-31T16:03:00.000-08:00

TREAT; 1. to provide with food, entertainment, or gifts; treated
her lover to something from Fredericks of Hollywood.
2. To give (someone or oneself) something pleasurable: treated
herself to a costume...
are you going to experience the fantasy?
Hhmm, let's see, what shall I be???

nurse feel-good
mystery madam
harem slave
sultry streetwalker
naughty school-girl or
head mistress...
devil or angel?
coy kitty-kat
volumptuous vampire
genie in a bottle
G.I. Jane
sexy copp
your princess... I will let you decide...so tell me:) Happy Haloween!

Nessun Dorma

2005-10-30T10:24:00.000-08:00

(None shall sleep)...by PUCCCINI~Turandot
One of my favorite songs...

I am sitting here listening to one of my favorite 'classical Italian Love' Songs CD.
When I listen to this, it takes me to another place, a place where I want to be.
It makes me feel good, uplifts my spirits, and I usually forget the things that are tugging
at my heart. I wish I knew what they were saying in Italian, but I think the music speaks for itself. sigh...

Gone

2005-10-27T09:41:00.000-07:00

I will be gone for awhile. Reading and writing for me has become much too painful...

My gems of advice...

2005-10-26T08:20:00.000-07:00

These are just some words of wisdom I try to pass on to my sons. I know things are much different now for kids growing up than it was for me in my generation! I may be 'open-minded' now, but I am still old- fashioned when it comes to the basics! As my sons are getting older(one will be flying the coop soon!) I just hope I have been the best mother that I could be, and what I have instilled in them they will use it to the best of their ability as they venture out into the world as young gentlemen...

Mom's little gems of advice...

*Laugh! loud and often.
*Family is important. Don't ever forget that.
*Say your prayers. God does listen.
*Be kind and considerate. Treat people how you want to be treated.
*There is a difference between being 'confident' and being cocky.
*When you fail, get back up. You will learn more from your failures, more so than your successes.
*Ask questions if your not sure about something.
*Always be true to yourself. Nobody is perfect.
*Pursue knowledge. Justification for higher education! Try to learn new things.
*Respect your elders. (very important)
*Respect women (just as important)
*Trust yourself. Your gut instinct is usually right.
*Don't give into peer pressure...You don't have to do anything you don't want to do.
*Choose a career path of something you enjoy and love.
*Keep your wit and charm.
*what comes around goes around.
*Take care of your body, and it will take care of you.
*enjoy your youth.
*variety is the spice of life...(open your mind and take a chance)
*It's fine to keep your pants zipped... (don't let the little head do the thinking for the big head)
*It's ok to cry and be emotional, no one will think less.
*You will know your soulmate the minute you look into her eyes.
*Don't settle for anything less.
*It's good to have fun, but spend your money wisely.
*volunteer your time. Give without expecting anything in return.
*Always know I love you.

*Enjoy today, because tommorow is never guaranteed... Love, mom

A part of me

2005-10-23T22:41:00.000-07:00

You will always be a part of me,
my sweet little honey,
I'm always here to protect you
by your side I will be.
Always got your back,
you know me.

What am I?
a friend?
a lover?
could I be both, I hope.
Sometimes can't have one without the other.

You will always be a part of me,
in my mind,
my heart,
and soul.
You're here with me.

Your the last thing I think about
before I close my eyes,
and also the first, when I rise.
I am there with you,
and you are here with me.

for now I kiss you goodnight...

Octoberfest

2005-10-18T06:09:00.000-07:00

I love October. Next to February, it has got to be one of my favorite months! I just love everything about it. The autumn colored leaves- oranges, golds, yellow, brown all over the ground. You can practically hear them crunch as you walk on them. I always think of kids running and jumping through the piles of leaves, throwing them up in the air. I would do that myself if there were leaves all over the place where I live!! I think I would have to go to Vermont or New England to see the colored leaves!!!
In California where I live, we don't get to see much of the four seasons. We have a pretty steady temperature year round almost. Right now, I would say this is the "Indian Summer. " It was around 80 degrees yesterday! In the winter, it does get cold, but we're talking maybe 50 degrees or so. For some states, that is nothing! We're not shoveling snow in the driveways, getting snowed in ( oohh, that seems like fun!) Not too many storms, perhaps an earthquake here and there, but that's pretty much it. We're spoiled when it comes to climate. I think that's part of the price we pay of living out here!!! Unbelievable cost of property!!! I love all the seasons especially the snow! (LOve those snow angels!) Perhaps one day soon, I will live where I can see all the 4 seasons at its best...

Things I love in October.....

Halloween!!! one of my favorite holidays!! I think it is getting bigger every year amongst the adults! It's not just for kids anymore! I think it must be the role-playing! you can be anything you want...

seeing the children all dressed up with such excitement! (priceless...)
Cool-crisp air
Apple cider
The pumpkin Patch! ( I love it!)
All the candy!!! I have a sweet tooth! especially taffy!
(Bad 80's) watching scary movies, lights out on the couch!!
smell of wood burning (get the fireplace on!!)
great colors...pruple, orange...black
craft faires- There is something special about homemade stuff...
carving pumpkins
full moons
Time to break out the scarves, hats, and gloves...

This is just a small list, it goes on...happy October to you!

Spellbound

2005-10-17T19:00:00.000-07:00

I'm in a daze, i'm in your spell,
i'm giving in...
when I saw you,
your face shining through
it hit me like a sunbeam.

inside and out,
i am crazy about,
the way you make my heart feel.
how did you know?
the way I felt about you?
longing to feel your kiss, your touch,
i am walking all lost,
without you.

your eyes, so mesmerizing,
your love, so bewitching,
from the depths of my soul
you leave me spellbound,
in your arms I will be...

Forbes...

2005-10-16T17:51:00.000-07:00

I found this quote while reading in Forbes. com. Yes, I do read other things besides Hustler and Playgirl!! LOL. I loved it so of course I had to put it up and share it with you. hehe
p.s. "we won't talk about the stock market and bonds in this post!" wtf is going on??

"Laughter is the only tranquilizer without any side effects!" anonymous

The moon

2005-10-14T11:08:00.000-07:00

The Moon...
something I enjoyed looking at,
daydreaming, thinking...
the fire and desire
of all there is to me.
It's light shining
for all to see,
Wondering if someone is looking for me.
How can you say the moon is not beautiful?
when it is the one thing we look at together.
when I look at moon and all it's beauty,
I think of you
and how beautiful you are to me.
In your eyes,
maybe I am just not beautiful to you...

Dear Daughter...

2005-10-13T19:24:00.000-07:00

For some time now I have been having reoccuring dreams of a daughter that I don't even have.
It started this year, and continues every so often. I don't know what triggers it, she just appears when she feels like it. I don't mind really. I am 'outnumbered' in my household. Even the dog is a male!! I have always dreamed of having a daughter, but I just learned to accept it was not going to happen in this lifetime, but perhaps the next.

I don't even know her name. A father or siblings is not revealed in the dream, either. She is just sitting at a park somewhere with my parents, my mom is fixing her hair which has little flowers in them. My mom talks to her and points at me. I am walking towards them. She has long dark hair, almost black, a light complexion, (I am darker-skinned) and big eyes like me. She is such a cutie! She must be around 3 or 4 years old. She is in an Easter dress of some sort and shoes. I can even remember her smile. I wake up some mornings with the sense of loss. Sometimes dreams can have such an impact...

A poem to the daughter I never had...

Where are you dear little one?
eyes of brown,
hair of black,
are you playing in the sand,
or picking flowers,
come to me,
as we walk hand in hand.

can I hear your voice?
or even hear you laugh.
just once I ask.

If you were here with me,
what fun we will have!
from egg hunts, to pumpkin patches,
even climbing trees.

It's so amazing how something so sweet
has come and rearranged my life,
I have been kissed by destiny.
Heaven has placed an angel at my feet.

But sweet little girl,
we cannot be together,
I cannot see me in you,
or you in me.
Not now, not this time.
So, until we meet again,
but hopefully in the next life
I will find you,
and you will be mine....... love, mom

Your Hands...My Story

2005-10-06T07:55:00.000-07:00

As I lay here naked in bed thinking about all the conversations we've had, from my love of Ladybugs, and drinking rainwater from flower petals,( aahhh, the simple things).... I think your beginning to know me like the back of your hand...and beautiful hands they are! You know I find hands sooo sexy in a man. Nice hands of course. So soft to the touch, yet strong enough to hold me, nice trimmed nails, and just the right amount of hair on them. You know how much I just love to hold them wherever we go. But most of all, they fit perfectly into mine. Yes, the hands that drive me wild with desire. You could love me with your just hands and I would be happy.
The way you caress my long golden-brown locks, and even pull them(we like it rough every now and then!)Those hands even find the way into my mouth as I gladly suck your fingers in and out. The touch of your fingertips down the nape of my neck, to my breasts-my nipples hardening already, then down the the curves of my back. Geezz, what I would give to have you here with me.
Those hands will definitely find its way home to my pussy. Your eyes closed now, smile on your face, sucking on your fingers. aaahh, you have found my fountain-of-youth!!
and are so ready to play in the water! My pussy is so wet just watching you. Your fingers circle around my box, touching it ever so lightly, I love the way you cup my pussy. Everything feels so right. You know just how I like it. Not to fast, not to slow. As your hands enter me, I can feel my pussy tightening around your fingers, my hips moving along in rhythm with your hands. My clit is hard as a rock now. You know this peach VERY well. You know when I cum because your beautiful hands are now soaked with my juices dripping everywhere. You taste me hungrily. My warm juice on your face, licking everywhere.
Those hands, that take me to the point of no return, those hands that are a perfect fit with mine, those hands that I love to hold, are home with me. Those hands belong to me. Those hands...when will I see again??

Things that annoy me....

2005-10-04T19:55:00.000-07:00

Well, i guess it's only fair that if I can write about things that make me happy or horny, I should write about the things that annoy me as well. We all have them, search deeeep within yourself and you just may find out there is more than we care to realize!!! Yikes!!! Like positive things in life, there are the negative. But hopefully we can meet that delicate balance in life so we don't let the bad overtake the good...and perhaps someday we can all look back and laugh and say"what the fuck was I thinking of back then???" lol

little annoyances...(based on my own experiences-in the swing scene as well as the real world.)

*all my hotties live far away....(I only have how many frequent flyer miles???)
*people who think bondage attire is just for halloween!
*The cost of lingerie and sexy outfits ( I never spent this much money on clothes before!)
*when my batteries die out on me:) (dammit, I was just in the middle of my orgasm...)
*when my dvd-laptop freezes up on me (oh well, I got Peter North's cum shots memorized!)
*girls who pole hog (c'mon, I can share)
*that most women won't throw their panties onstage to the band! (support your local bands people!!!)
*men I don't know who send me cock shot pics
*game players, whiners, or rude people
*Profiles (ads) of couples who only have HER pics up (there are 2 of you)
*single men who pose as a couple online
*couples that have jealousy issues in lifestyle events
*people who answer their phones in the middle of a date, dinner, or even sex!
*waiting in a red light when there is not any cars!!!
*bad customer service
*people who don't follow through with what they say (i.e, if you say your going to call...)
*people who don't leave tips even when they get excelllent service!
*putting away the laundry (blah, blah, blah...)
*reading the last page of a very good book:)
*being at a sexy 'vanilla' club knowing there isn't going to be an afterparty:(
*couples that don't let each other play (one plays and the other half can't...)
*waiting for that one letter, e-mail, or call that you just never got...
*missed connections
*putting gas in the car
*trying to find parking in the city
*bad television (wtf is up with all these reality shows????)
*no ketchup for my fries

well, these are just a few...nothing to drastic I hope. perhaps I should do a post of "Things that really piss me off!!! lol No, life is tooo short to give my attention to the negative energy....

so, what annoys you??? :)

Why I Write...my thoughts

2005-10-03T19:21:00.000-07:00

I know I've been asked by some of you, some people that I know, and some that I have never met, or just happen to send me an e-mail from other 'adult' swing web sites that I am on, why I don't write too much naughty stuff? yes, I do agree with you. People want to read the sexy stuff! I even love to read the sexy stuff! Let's face it...SEX SELLS. I know there are alot of blogs related to "swinging adventures" or "sex diaries" etc...(who knows, perhaps one is mine anonymously!:) that are just to juicy to read! I mean were not perverts of some sort. Were just more open and uninhibited than the majority. I think people are so enthralled and allured by the whole idea of the kinkyness and just being plain naughty with other people besides your mate! Mind you, the whole swinging idea is not one of deceit, eveything is pretty much open on the table and consenting!! I mean, who wants to read escapades about you and your spouse? ( or other) no one really. They want to read the details that's "out of the norm." Whether or not you agree with this swinging lifestyle, that's your business...
Well, back to question...perhaps I will write more naughty stuff, but if you read some of my past posts, this blog is more about me personally. I really didn't intend this on being a Swing blog of some sort. It's ok with me if 7 people hit this site, or 70,000 like my other sites. It's ok with me.
I write because it's just my release. I also write so I can keep track of what the hell is going on in my life. How I feel at this place and time. This is more of the 'Romantic' side of me that I didn't know existed! I mean, Sex is Sex, yes, it is a good thing. I know what I am capable of doing in and out of the bedroom. I don't have to prove myself to anyone. I like to be remembered for who I am inside, not how I looked, dressed, etc... Sometimes, I write because I am lonely. Yes, we all get lonely at times.
I write because I just want to get some of my thoughts, dreams, fears, and maybe even fantasies out in the open. But for me, in this lifestyle, I am already living in the "moment" of the fantasy, (not living the fantasy) and that is the beauty of it. I mean just where will you ever see one girl having 4 cocks standing over her all at once?? or having a guy have his cock sucked by 5 different women because it was his birthday? I mean literally!!! That was one lucky guy! (and girl!) yes, it does happen! 4 or 5 years ago, I would've thought WTF? but now, BRING IT ON! SOME PEOPLE DO CHANGE! Because once an escapade is over, that's it... we are back to reality. Back to work, back to bills, back to life. And in those 'moments' I treasure. (we all love to have good sexual experiences but I wont lie, there have been ones I would rather forget!) That's why I tend to shy away from writing about them. The ones I keep, I keep close to my heart...but who knows???? you just might read something naughty soon...:)

When??? ...He Said

2005-09-30T20:51:00.000-07:00

"anytime", I replied.
Separate lives, and worlds apart
time and distance
soon will tell
"I will always be here for you,
open up your heart
and let me in."

"When can I feel your lips on mine?"
and to touch the body I so desired,
When? he said. When?

sooner than the winds blow
and even the brightest of the full moon.
Just close your eyes
and I am just a thought away.

Do me this favor:
when you see the full moon
make a wish
and think of me
as I will be thinking of you
and we shall be looking at the moon together.

worlds apart, but just a thought away
and if tonight is all we have, then just stay...

when? will I see you again...

Love Parade & Folsom St.Fair (leatherfest)

2005-09-29T07:10:00.000-07:00

This passed weekend was the annual Love parade. My hotel was right on the street where they came by which was good, because I wasn't about to go driving around trying to find the parade! I didn't even know there was some parade and Love fest going on. I originally came for A sexy "Back to School Party" dance party and then the Folsom St. Fair(leatherfest) on sunday.

The parade in itself was beautiful. Thousands of people packed the streets. Lots of floats coming by. The difference of this parade were each float had dj's spinning music on each them, people dancing on the floats, and they even had tons of people following each float dancing to the music. They were people dancing on the streets(they encouraged it) wild and crazy costumes, dancing girls, nude or topless women wandering around even nude men got in the mix! I love it! I swear, only in San Fran will you ever see so much openness, diversity, and all the different lifestyles mixed into one. I was invited to a "My space" after party going on at some club that night, I didn't go, I am not a member of my space, and plus I had other plans. Here's a website that has some photos of the parade. www.freewebgallery.com/photoanvil I have my own as well and I will put a few up.

The "back to school party" went well. There must have been at least 400 couples there, not including the single women. I always have a good time, a place where women can wander around looking and dressing sexy and be safe without the usual drama and harrassment most women receive from single men of the regular club scence. Everybody's friendly, no one is shy to introduce themselves, you can let your guard down, and all the while play with women or men you connect with. (play meaning, sexy dancing, kissing, touching etc.. "THIS IS NOT A SEX CLUB" let me re-itterate that. You want to get together with people, take it back to your own after party in your room!!! My original costume was going to be the teacher. The "Head Mistress"!lol I had everything, the glasses, blazer, but my garter belt wouldn't snap to hold the thigh high stockings!! so, I went as a naughty schoolgirl. Braless fishnet top works just as good, I had no complaints:)

Sunday was the Folsom St. Fair.(leatherfest) This is my first year visiting this event. Of course we had to get in the mix and wear our leather also. If you weren't wearing some type of leather, you were the oddball. This was the perfect time to wear my leather pants with open buckles on the side and new leather corsett. (Trust me, by the time the day was done, I wish I was in my t-shirts and tennis shoes!) T-bone, a partner in crime, wore his thong and leather chaps, no shirt, and collar! He has a very nice ass and physique so he can get away with it.:) It was such a beautiful day... There were tons of booths, showing off the latest in leather goods. collars, corssetts, chains, sex toys, piercing booths, leather whips, masks, things for S&M, they had people getting spanked, tied up, for demonstrations, anything you could think of, it was there. There were couples walking aaround where the female had a leash connected to the males collared neck! Nice!! Even male and female porn stars giving a little show for you. There was one bit, a male porn star in his leather chaps and thong, gyrating grabbing his cock and fingering his ass and the whole crowd went nuts! I was a bit turned on myself!:)
There were people in costumes, people wearing hardly nothing at all, women going topless, and even some going completely nude. I seen one man walking around naked with just chains on his ankles! Of course there were the "vanilla" people gawking, taking pictures and saying "oh my god"did you see that??? Fucking bullshit!! Why the fuck are you there if you don't want to see that? Idiots!! AS you walked through the fair, you would catch kinky stuff going on to the side of the streets... there were blowjobs going on with f/m , fmf, mm, mmf, all kinds of play going on!!
I loved it! everybody so open. Like I said earlier, nothing like this beats San Fran.I tell you, this has been my tits galore weekend! Hooray for all the uninhibited people!!!! People just going about there business, wearing whatever the hell they want, the gay community doing there own thing, and you know what?? I love 'em. Because they just don't give a fuck what you think...

Virtual love-A poem

2005-09-25T10:01:00.000-07:00

Virtual love, do you really exist?
or are you just a figment of my imagination?
hundreds to chose from
just want my one-in-a-million.
I've been alone inside myself
for far too long
I never wanted it that way, but I let it happen.
I read your words
as if your whispering in the wind
is it me your thinking of, or another?
when I close my eyes, I still can see your smile
bright enough to light up my life
where are you now...
What I would give, just to see you.
Just once,
to see you with my very eyes
to put that voice with the face
I even heard cry.
To feel the hands that write into my heart,
get out of my head,
and into my bed
and tonight love will assume its place.
It's funny how from the simple things,
the best things begin.
Please believe it's true, when I tell you
I love you
for one day soon, I will come for you
my virtual love...